Brandy's Story: Transitioning to Independent Living

We would like to express our appreciation to the Portage County Department of Health and Human Services Department for inviting us to interview Brandy, and for Brandy’s willingness to share her personal experiences with all of you in Fostering Across Wisconsin. Due to space limitations, we were unable to include her full story but we invite you to read the full account of Brandy’s story below.

According to the Jim Casey Youth Opportunities Initiative, on any given day, more than half a million American children live in foster care. Each year, about 20,000 of them will “age out” of the system. Successfully transitioning into adulthood is often a challenge for any young adult and can be especially challenging for foster youth. This is one person’s successful journey from foster care to independent living.

“An amazing person.” That’s how Brandy is described by her social worker, Julie Wallace, who goes on to say that, “Brandy inspires all of us in the agency to get up and do what we do every day.”

But Julie is not the only one who has high praise for this young lady. Her foster mother has described Brandy as a “gift.” Brandy was committed to doing well in foster care and her positive attitude and outlook on life empowered her to make the best out of a difficult situation.

Brandy was placed with Carl and Carol, licensed foster parents with the Portage County Department of Human Services, when she was 13 years old. At the time, Brandy had been told by her birth parents that she wouldn’t be in placement for more than two weeks. Two weeks quickly became a month and a month turned into six months; six months quickly became a year and a year multiplied into five years.

Brandy experienced many personal hardships prior to her placement in foster care. She reported that she didn’t have adequate or enough clothing and the clothes she did have did not fit her properly. In addition, she felt as if she was homeless at times because she was always eating at other people’s houses because there was not enough food at her house. According to Brandy, her parents kept her in her room by herself and, as a result, she left her house frequently and stayed out too late.

Brandy admitted that being placed in foster care was “scary at first,” mainly because she felt abandoned by her parents. Reflecting back on her initial placement with Carl and Carol, Brandy realized that the first few weeks in her foster home were an adjustment for everyone involved. Brandy said that she attempted to return to her parental home but her parents kept “shutting [her] out.”

Brandy did not understand why her parents didn’t call her, but she received continual support and encouragement from her foster parents. Brandy said, “My foster parents encouraged me to always leave the door open to my parents.”

She turned to her foster parents for guidance, mentoring and support.

“Thank you will never be enough,“ Brandy said.“They have done so much and they will always be in my heart. They made me the person I am today. I will always love them.”

Over the course of the past year, Brandy has experienced many milestones. She purchased her first automobile, with guidance and support from her foster father and mother. She found employment at a fast food restaurant and has established her own savings account. Brandy also successfully earned her High School Diploma and was awarded a Scholarship from DECA (Distributive Education Clubs of America, Incorporated).

She has received additional support and assistance from her social worker, Julie Wallace, in terms of exploring scholarship and grant opportunities in an effort to secure additional financial assistance. She is using her scholarship and other forms of financial assistance to pay for tuition at a local Mid-State Technical College. She is enrolled with an interest in Cosmetology, which is a big change from someone who said that, prior to her placement in foster care, she was “dark and gothic,” as opposed to how she now describes herself—preppy and cute.”

Brandy has successfully transitioned from foster care to independent living. She moved into a house with Carl and Carol’s daughter, Amy, who Brandy describes as “my best friend, my mentor.” Brandy’s positive attitude and commitment to achieving excellence, combined with the loving support, guidance and nurturing of her foster parents, has provided her with endless options and opportunities for continued success and personal fulfillment.

Successful transitions to independent living are built on positive support networks. In Brandy’s situation, she attributes the support that she received from her foster parents, her foster family, her social workers, educational staff, and her own personal drive and determination as catalysts that empowered her to achieve her aspirations and goals.

Brandy has touched the lives of everyone in her life and has, in turn, been touched and inspired by her foster family.

Brandy shared this advice to all foster parents and prospective foster parents:

1. Be open minded
2. Make sure you can always be there for the children entrusted into your care
3. Be sincere
4. Make sure you will be able to handle the child who is placed in your care
5. Make sure you make time for your foster child because you are needed
6. Always make yourself available to talk with your children
7. Be patient

Our message to foster parents:

You do make a lifetime of difference by touching the lives of children who are entrusted to your care and supervision. You are given an amazing gift and, in return, you are rewarded with the knowledge that you have truly made a difference in the life of a child.